Up Ahead... Change!
Heading somewhere new.
Dealing with transition.
I love Jesus. Like, A LOT! This is not a "Christian blog" but both Lee and I, love Jesus and you will hear that love throughout our blogs because it's part of us authentically sharing with you our journeys.
Today, I want to share with you some things that have to do with my relationship with Jesus and the new direction He's leading me.
I hate change!
Let's start with that.
Change is scary.
Let's start with that.
Change is scary.
Change is difficult.
Change is stressful and I don't like it!
I'm the kind of person who will eat the same thing every time at a restaurant because I know I like it. Or buy the same makeup product again and again even though I looked at a million other options. I know what I like and I like it that way. So change, though exciting, is pretty daunting to me.
I have known about Jesus and been "A believer" since a very young age but it wasn't till I was 19 that I really gave God the control over my life and surrendered to Him. At age nineteen I went from being a "Good Christian" to be a follower of Jesus Christ. If your not a Christian or don't follow Christ, let me explain a little what this means, at least my experience.
Being a Christian to me was about not screwing up. About doing things right, trying to be perfect and not make mistakes so God could do something good with my life... It was about EARNING forgiveness and grace (which in reality, can never be earned). To me it was about being "good enough".
At nineteen I fell to my knees and gave God my all. My life, my plans, my DREAMS... That was the hardest! I had lots of dreams and I wanted God to make MY dreams happen, not be a part of His dreams for me. I made that commitment and I have never looked back. (I'm very serious about commitment).
Every time God would put something on my heart, I would remember my promise to let Him lead my life and I'd follow. That is what being a follower of Jesus means to me. It's a wonderful and adventurous place of surrender and trust in Jesus that comes full of every difficult human emotion.
I've been following Jesus for over ten years now. :D :D <3 It's been a crazy wonderful ride. Through the years I have prioritized spending alone time talking (praying) out loud to Jesus every day, and through the years I've learned what His voice sounds like and how He leads me. (For me hearing God usually looks like having a feeling that doesn't come from me or an idea or thought that I'd like to take credit for but isn't really my plan or idea).
|This image shows so much of what I've found following Jesus is like.|
There is tons of love, beauty, and closeness.
So, recently, He's been putting change on my heart. And remember, I hate change, so this is that "idea that doesn't come from me" part. I prayed against the change. I prayed God would just make the situation more comfy for me... Then I realized it was Him, not me, who had the idea that a move was in order, that He was leading and I'm committed to following.
This move I've been feeling led towards is moving churches. As I already said, I'm a commitment person so I've been at the same church for 9 years, change isn't easy. But I've been having the increasing desire and urge to find a smaller place. A smaller church that I would have more opportunities to love on people in a relational way. That I would be able to pour out even more and be a follower that gets to love even more on others.
So, change comes.
It changes things not just for me, but for my family. For my kids... Mama, it's hard making decisions that effect our kids, even when we know there is something better for them, and us. It's hard to uproot and move, in any capacity, from what you and your kids know and feel comfortable with.
My encouragement for you. Be committed! Be faithful! Be steadfast... but when it's time to make a change. Be bold! Explain to your kids, honestly, why your making a change and what they can expect from it. Let them know it's okay to be sad and disappointed. Help them through the emotions and be their steady in the change.
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