Courage to Grow
Courage to Change
When I was pregnant with my son I was so worried about my daughters, especially my youngest, who'd been "the baby", my baby, for so long. I knew the love would only grow but I was worried about being able to give her the time and attention she needed. I was worried about her separation anxieties and that it would trigger her fears.
Well, it did. Me being pregnant and her realizing she was going to be the middle child (even though she would always mommy's baby) brought up a lot of fears and concerns in her. For the first three months of my pregnancy, as our little son grew from microscopic life to little human kicking and moving within me, I didn't feel so good. I was nauseous and so tired.
During those first three months was when my daughter's fears and worries came up the most. I remember driving in the van and asking my daughter what her fears were and talking about them, helping her with knowing the truth. I remember her having fits and meltdowns frequently. I remember it was quite a struggle and she had to work through some deep thoughts and feelings.
By the second trimester she was a little more settle, a little more secure, but still wary. Then the third trimester came and she regularly talked and felt her brother kick and move inside me. My daughter could calm him like no one else, he would stop moving just to listen to her voice. She bonded with her brother while he was still growing inside me.
Then came the day of his birth... While in labor I was able to say goodbye to them before their Nana took them to her house, but despite that, they were SO afraid! They were afraid mom was going to die, that their brother wouldn't be okay, they were so scared! A dear lady at church prayed for them that very day while I was in labor and for me.
I was okay, despite a scary amount of blood loss, baby was okay, it was hard, I was very weak, but everyone was safe and okay (so grateful to God. I had so much peace). July 18, 2018 about two hours after I'd given birth my daughters came to meet their brand new baby brother. My first babies got to meet a baby I had the privilege of carrying and delivering.
What a golden moment! I lay in bed, holding their baby brother and they came over, both looking so pleased, so excited, and so relieved as well. All was well. They were so happy to see me happy and alive and their baby brother finally out and here to hold and love on.
They got to hold him and say hello. They gave me hugs. It was so beautiful. And though there was a big adjustment period for all of us, having another child around, having a baby, having a new sibling for our girls, it has been an endless joy.
When I prayed for our baby, before he was ever conceived (we prayed and waited for him a LONG time), I prayed he would bring joy and he certainly has! He has brought so much joy to our family and also to every one he meets. He talks, he smiles, he waves, he laughs, and he seems to love everyone.
Change is always challenging. Growth takes work and effort, but their is nothing sweeter than seeing the joy and growth through change. Our family changed a lot by adding another child to it, but so much for the better. It takes courage. Let your love grow and multiply!