An Angry Parent
This morning was rough.
I was ticked. I was irritable, I felt like doom and gloom, and to be honest I was just plain mad...
Mad at the world, mad at my kids, even mad at my husband for no stupid reason. I was even mad at people I haven't even talked to recently. I was mad at the world because everything seems like so much work! I was mad at the kids for all the bad and irritating behaviors I have to deal with. I was mad at my husband because the phone died while I was trying to vent (a very stupid reason to be mad, I know). I was mad about everything!
Grrrrrrr! And I was mad at my neighbor for the smoke smell that came floating through my window first thing this morning when I opened it for "fresh air"
Mad.
What to do? I knew I was in a foul mood. I felt like doing nothing at all! I especially didn't want to do anything for/with my kiddos with all the bad attitudes and behaviors going on.
I first hid away while getting ready for the day (this was when I tried venting to my husband and the phone died and I got more mad). Still mad.
So I tried detracting myself with entertainment and other things. Still mad but better than before. Calmed down mad at least. I had to make a decision. Give in to my anger or get out of it. I had made an effort, yes, and it had helped but it was almost lunch time and I had to decide to put my anger aside and do something good with my morning or let my foul start to the day dictate the whole morning.
I decided to do something good. With only 30 minutes till lunch I packed up the kids, grabbed our rickety yellow wagon, and headed out the door and down the street.
The sun was out and it was a beautiful contrast to the dark, cold morning it had been thus far. I still felt mad inside despite my efforts so I decided to "use my words" as I always tell my kids to do. I expressed that I was angry and why I was angry and then let it go.
Within minutes my mood changed. I had done all I could. I had expressed myself, now there was nothing else to do but let go. So I let go, hopped into the wagon with the baby and started coasting down the nearest hill.
The smiles on my face transferred quickly to my my kids' faces. My girls ran along side me and the baby as I excited and scared went down little hill after little hill, laughing, yelling a little, and looking like a happy fool.
We had a great walk! We all took turns in the wagon. They pushed and pulled me as I and the baby rode. Then they got in and I pushed and pulled them around. We stopped by a pear tree and picked up pears from the ground.
I saw a Mom walking with her baby and gave a cheerful "Good morning!" and she just looked at me and kept walking... Okay, well maybe I'm being judged or maybe her baby was asleep and she just didn't want to wake him up, I don't know.
It was hard to choose fun, joy, and to play with my kids instead of stay in the bitterness and anger I was feeling. It was hard to let go of my foul morning and disappointments and enjoy the moments, but it is a choice.
Feelings are feelings. They're important, they need to be acknowledged and worked through, but we have a choice what to do next. We have a choice of how we direct ourselves and our days when the difficult and discouraged feelings come.
Always remember Mama, you are strong, you are smart, and your the perfect women for the job!
Much love,
-Joy
You might also enjoy:
How to Deal with Anger
Having a Bad Day
I was ticked. I was irritable, I felt like doom and gloom, and to be honest I was just plain mad...
Mad at the world, mad at my kids, even mad at my husband for no stupid reason. I was even mad at people I haven't even talked to recently. I was mad at the world because everything seems like so much work! I was mad at the kids for all the bad and irritating behaviors I have to deal with. I was mad at my husband because the phone died while I was trying to vent (a very stupid reason to be mad, I know). I was mad about everything!
Grrrrrrr! And I was mad at my neighbor for the smoke smell that came floating through my window first thing this morning when I opened it for "fresh air"
Mad.
What to do? I knew I was in a foul mood. I felt like doing nothing at all! I especially didn't want to do anything for/with my kiddos with all the bad attitudes and behaviors going on.
I first hid away while getting ready for the day (this was when I tried venting to my husband and the phone died and I got more mad). Still mad.
So I tried detracting myself with entertainment and other things. Still mad but better than before. Calmed down mad at least. I had to make a decision. Give in to my anger or get out of it. I had made an effort, yes, and it had helped but it was almost lunch time and I had to decide to put my anger aside and do something good with my morning or let my foul start to the day dictate the whole morning.
I decided to do something good. With only 30 minutes till lunch I packed up the kids, grabbed our rickety yellow wagon, and headed out the door and down the street.
The sun was out and it was a beautiful contrast to the dark, cold morning it had been thus far. I still felt mad inside despite my efforts so I decided to "use my words" as I always tell my kids to do. I expressed that I was angry and why I was angry and then let it go.
Within minutes my mood changed. I had done all I could. I had expressed myself, now there was nothing else to do but let go. So I let go, hopped into the wagon with the baby and started coasting down the nearest hill.
The smiles on my face transferred quickly to my my kids' faces. My girls ran along side me and the baby as I excited and scared went down little hill after little hill, laughing, yelling a little, and looking like a happy fool.
We had a great walk! We all took turns in the wagon. They pushed and pulled me as I and the baby rode. Then they got in and I pushed and pulled them around. We stopped by a pear tree and picked up pears from the ground.
I saw a Mom walking with her baby and gave a cheerful "Good morning!" and she just looked at me and kept walking... Okay, well maybe I'm being judged or maybe her baby was asleep and she just didn't want to wake him up, I don't know.
It was hard to choose fun, joy, and to play with my kids instead of stay in the bitterness and anger I was feeling. It was hard to let go of my foul morning and disappointments and enjoy the moments, but it is a choice.
Feelings are feelings. They're important, they need to be acknowledged and worked through, but we have a choice what to do next. We have a choice of how we direct ourselves and our days when the difficult and discouraged feelings come.
Always remember Mama, you are strong, you are smart, and your the perfect women for the job!
Much love,
-Joy
You might also enjoy:
How to Deal with Anger
Having a Bad Day
Comments
Post a Comment