Should Babies Cry?
I met a friend at the park recently.
It was really nice to get out of the house and get to interact with a fellow mama.
Her son is 7 months younger than mine, so we have a lot to relate on. We got on the topic of sleep and letting babies cry.
This is a topic that I've engaged in over and over and even wrote on it (if you have a young baby read this: 5 Sleep Tips You Have Probably Never Heard Before). As a mom to a newborn, what I wanted to know most about sleep.
HOW DO I GET THIS BABY TO SLEEP???!!!!
And everywhere I read (I shouldn't Google things) it said "Leave the baby to cry", "Have the baby put himself to sleep", and put him down sleepy, but awake". All good advice in it's proper place! Not during the early stages.
So we got to talk about sleep and whether we should let our babies cry. "What do you think people did back in the days of smaller homes and the baby always in the room with you?" I asked. "Do we really think anyone would just let there baby cry for a long time if they had be in the same room listening to them?"
Babies cry, because they need us. They need us to respond to them because this builds trust and bonding. They need us because they can't do for themselves. It's a hard time, it's a challenging time, but it's such a crucial one. We are designed to respond to our babies crying. We are programmed not to like the sound of crying. It's on purpose, like so many other things, it's not a design flaw, it's not something we as moms, should just "get over". If our baby cries, it's because they need us, want us, and our expressing themselves.
Now, I need to make sure I'm honest, I've let my baby cry! But when he was older and didn't want help (nursing or rocking) to go to sleep. I do set my baby down sleepy but awake and have off and on (according to his needs) since 3 months old.
But then teething hits or a growth spurt and he's uncomfortable and even in pain and he needs me and my comfort. He cries! And I usually get irritated that he's not sleepy, but then I go and hold him close and hum into his ear and wonder why I wish so much he'd sleep on his own. Yes, I'd get to do my own thing.... but he won't want me to rock him forever and it's so special to get to snuggle my now little boy and watch him fall asleep.
Mamas, you know your baby best! Don't let any piece of advice, from me or anyone else, divert you from what you know is best for your child! You know when to let them cry and when to pick them up and snuggle them. You know. Trust that.
Much love,
-Joy
It was really nice to get out of the house and get to interact with a fellow mama.
Her son is 7 months younger than mine, so we have a lot to relate on. We got on the topic of sleep and letting babies cry.
This is a topic that I've engaged in over and over and even wrote on it (if you have a young baby read this: 5 Sleep Tips You Have Probably Never Heard Before). As a mom to a newborn, what I wanted to know most about sleep.
HOW DO I GET THIS BABY TO SLEEP???!!!!
And everywhere I read (I shouldn't Google things) it said "Leave the baby to cry", "Have the baby put himself to sleep", and put him down sleepy, but awake". All good advice in it's proper place! Not during the early stages.
So we got to talk about sleep and whether we should let our babies cry. "What do you think people did back in the days of smaller homes and the baby always in the room with you?" I asked. "Do we really think anyone would just let there baby cry for a long time if they had be in the same room listening to them?"
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| Photo Credit: Mama Natural |
Babies cry, because they need us. They need us to respond to them because this builds trust and bonding. They need us because they can't do for themselves. It's a hard time, it's a challenging time, but it's such a crucial one. We are designed to respond to our babies crying. We are programmed not to like the sound of crying. It's on purpose, like so many other things, it's not a design flaw, it's not something we as moms, should just "get over". If our baby cries, it's because they need us, want us, and our expressing themselves.
Now, I need to make sure I'm honest, I've let my baby cry! But when he was older and didn't want help (nursing or rocking) to go to sleep. I do set my baby down sleepy but awake and have off and on (according to his needs) since 3 months old.
But then teething hits or a growth spurt and he's uncomfortable and even in pain and he needs me and my comfort. He cries! And I usually get irritated that he's not sleepy, but then I go and hold him close and hum into his ear and wonder why I wish so much he'd sleep on his own. Yes, I'd get to do my own thing.... but he won't want me to rock him forever and it's so special to get to snuggle my now little boy and watch him fall asleep.
Mamas, you know your baby best! Don't let any piece of advice, from me or anyone else, divert you from what you know is best for your child! You know when to let them cry and when to pick them up and snuggle them. You know. Trust that.
Much love,
-Joy
There is a lot of research recently about how babies crying impacts not only their own brains, but their mother’s as well. It’s always neat when science backs up intuition.
ReplyDeleteThat's really neat. I like how science backs up and shows physical evidence that God's plans are good and we should pay attention to how he wires us.
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