It's Ok That It's Hard..
Have you ever seen Return To Me?
It's one of my favorite romantic comedies. It's sweet and clean and makes me cry every time. There is a scene in which one of the main characters, who was just recently saved by a heart transplant, is talking to her doctor about how she feels guilty about complaining about bad days because she feels like she should never have any bad days anymore because this miracle has saved her life.
It reminds me of how I first felt about motherhood. I've just received this incredibly beautiful baby, this gift from heaven, how could I ever have a bad day again? How could I ever be sad again? How could I ever be angry?
Ha. Ha. Ha.
|Having a baby with separation anxiety during teething is just plain exhausting.|
Flash forward to over 11 years later. My fifth baby is working on breaking three teeth through in one week. I'm still struggling with surgery pain (9 weeks post-surgery) which is extremely frustrating and makes taking care of the baby pretty hard at times. My middle child's (still undiagnosed) behaviors can be so nerve wrecking that I can hardly stay in the same room as him. Oh, and the whole world is in the middle of a pandemic and we're all forced into isolation for the good of mankind. That's a recipe for a few hard days.
No, I'm not suffering from the complications of coronavirus, and neither are any of my loved ones. My husband hasn't lost his job, we are not in danger of losing our home, and we could eat out of our freezer and pantry for quite a while before going hungry. We are very blessed.
But that doesn't mean I should feel bad about having a hard day. Because some days are just plain hard.
Yes, I believe in the power of positive thinking. Yes, I know my attitude plays a big part in defining how my day goes. I'm not saying we should wallow in misery because life is hard.
I'm just saying, IT'S OK IF YOU ARE HAVING A HARD TIME RIGHT NOW.
I'm not into comparing people's challenges, hard is hard, whatever that means for the individual. I think we all agree that we are living through some pretty challenging times.
I just want to encourage you to try to get as much help as you can right now. Put a movie on for the kids so you can Facetime with a friend. Don't feel bad for handing the baby off to your hubby for an hour so you can go somewhere and be alone (without anyone touching or talking to you). Let the baby cry for a few minutes so you can collect yourself and get your emotions under control. Skip a day of the kids' school if you just don't feel like you can handle teaching them that day.
And don't feel disappointed in yourself because you are having a hard time. We have all been there, mama.
Lots and lots of love,