Dear Mama, Do The Hard Things
A few weeks ago, I was feeling pretty depressed.
Most of you know about my pain journey. Long story short: I've been in pain for 8 years now. I'm tired of all the details so wont share them. Back in the fall I was referred to physical therapy again, but as I literally start hyperventilating whenever I have a mask on, exercising while wearing one was something that I just didn't think I could handle. So I tried to do my exercises at home, but over did it and felt worse and just let myself get plain discouraged. Every once-in-a-while I would do a yoga video or try to go for a walk. The videos usually helped, the walking did not.
Well, a few weeks ago I decided I was just going to bite the bullet and commit to doing the yoga videos consistently (I highly recommend Caroline William's Christian yoga videos). Even if it was only a 12 minute one, I decided that I would do a video every day I was not planning on some other activity that I knew would be taxing to my body (like clam digging).
To set myself up for this habit, I moved my yoga mat and block into our bedroom. Now that the toddler bed is out of the room and the cradle is in, there is just enough room to roll the mat out beside our bed and I am able to cast the video on our bedroom TV. Doing this meant that I would be able to bypass the steps it would take to get the kids to clean the living room and roll up the area rug in there (and sweep the floor, and who knows what else that would lead to) before I could do my workout. Not to mention it meant I could close my bedroom door on distractions and interruptions when my hubby was home to watch the kids, or at least minimalize them by being in another room. There have still been plenty of interruptions.
And there are plenty of times I've wanted to use those interruptions as an excuse to either stop or not even try to start my workout. And there are so many times I feel like a pose is just too hard (I am so weak from years of reduced activity) that I just want to stop and cry and give up. But I haven't yet! Even though I have (admittedly) really, really wanted to.
I am almost three weeks into it, and I must say, it has been worth it! I am feeling stronger and having less pain in my daily life.
I still have to modify some of the positions because of my injuries, but there are some I can now do without pain that I couldn't do when I started. I still have daily pain and can't do all the things I want to do, but I feel like I am making small steps towards my goals. And though it is still frustrating to be so far from those goals, it's nice to know that some progress is happening.
I wouldn't want anyone to watch me do my exercises, that's for sure! And I certainly don't feel graceful or experienced. But there are some times when I feel like I have really nailed a pose and I feel strong and victorious.
Because I am victorious. I am getting stronger. Doing the hard things is paying off.
We as mamas choose to do hard things for our children every day. There are so many times we feel like failures or just want to give up. I want to encourage you, mama, to keep doing the hard things, for your kids and for yourself. No matter what kind of obstacles life tries to throw your way. Take the steps to do it.
Your kids are worth it. You are worth it. God will give you the strength you need to do it.
Lots of love,